Fast Changing Gas Attendent

My husband asked me to stop and get gas tonight. I had an appointment so I stopped on my way home. Most gas stations have attendants that pump the gas for you. It's a security measure so it requires prepay and no drive off.

On my way out of the house my husband hands me what I thought was five L100 bills. L100 = about US $5 and the capital letter L = lempira, the Honduran currency. He said "put gas in the car". I didn't count it at the time, but we had discussed taking L500 previously. Once at the gas station I hand the (5) bills to the attendant and he walks away. He punches some buttons on the gas pump or does something I couldn't see and then turns back to me and spreads the bills out in his hands and says (in Spanish) "only four hundred". I say, "no, five hundred". As he stood there holding out the four wrinkly bills for me to see as if to say, "no lady, see, you only gave L400". I started second guessing myself and wondering if I miscounted & misplaced a L100 bill or maybe my husband only gave me L400 not L500 as I thought. I wasn't sure and I didn't know how to argue the point.

There I was just screaming to be taken advantage of. I had just experienced recently that the customer is not someone thought highly of or respected. Who was going to believe me? I felt stuck. So yes, this white girl was taken advantage of, fast changed and lost a quick $5 bucks. You might think $5 dollars is not a lot to lose, but we live on Honduran wages, not US wages. Many people live on that much a day or less. It's hard to compare, but if I lose L100 here it is like losing US $20 dollars in the states.

Once I got home and told my husband, of course he said I should have called him, but in my confused mind it didn't occur to me. He confirmed that he did give me L500 and after a thorough search of my purse, my husband being so protective, wanted us to drive back to the gas station and try and set some things straight, but it was getting late and it was just not worth the time, gas, hassle and headache. I told my husband that we should just leave it up to God if he wants to teach that guy a lesson. I know I learned one. Be very, very careful and count out your money to the gas pump attendants and make sure you both agree what amount is being exchanged. Video tape it if possible.

Would you go back to the gas station and confront him?

You Break It - You Buy It

Yes, this gringa lost her cool again. While shopping. So I'll tell you again how uncool I was. Why not?

In the last post, I mentioned that most of our glass glasses have broken. Well, our glasses aren't the only thing that we are short on. Our dish supply continues to shrink as well. Saturday while doing dishes I broke the 3rd out of 4 ceramic plates. The kids and I went to the mall for lunch on Sunday and afterwards stopped into a local department store. They have a large kitchen and dish section and they also have a section where they sell single pieces of dishes. This would be from sets that are incomplete probably due to damage , so they sell them separately. I figured a few pieces would be good enough for the time being.

I've never really liked shopping here in Honduras. It's a different kind of experience. A lot less gratifying than the shopping I've done in the US. Now I could get sued for talking bad about this one particular store, but I just have to say that I will probably never go shopping in another Lady Lee department store again. I had had enough and this was the last straw.

I'll tell you what I experience here in San Pedro Sula when I go shopping. It may change a little from store to store. Most stores have security when you walk in. If you have any other bags with you, you must check them at the front. There is usually a sign that says firearms are not allowed in the store. All these things I can deal with. It is when you get past the security you will notice one or a plethora of store personal ready to follow you around the store always a few feet away. They may ask you if you need any help. They at times can be very helpful. But I don't always need undivided attention when I'm shopping. Sometimes I want to just look. But often there will always be someone right there to roam the store with you. I've experienced this hovering the worst in Lady Lee and in that other grocery store where I lost my cool. It makes me wonder what they are thinking. I also know that they work on commission so maybe they hover around me more because I'm white and think I might spend more money? Do they think I might steal something? Whatever the reason, this hovering drives me mad and makes shopping very unpleasant for me. I can usually feel my stress level go up when I walk into a store. And I guess on Sunday I hit a breaking point. (Pun intended)

We were in Lady Lee by all the random dishes display. There are dishes and mugs and bowls all precariously stacked from the ground up to about chest height on a glass shelf display. I stop to inspect some dishes (of course being closely watched) and my daughter and son walk away from me to look at something. A moment later I hear a mug break from the other side of the display. Yep, it's my son. Now I don't know if he picked it up and dropped it, bumped it or what, but these mugs were stacked one on top of the other. Not the best way to display mugs in the middle of a high traffic area of the store IMO. Crap. If you go shopping in Honduras and you break something - you buy it. So here I was ready to spend some money in the store, but because as soon as the mug broke I had three store personal surrounding me I felt irritated and decided to see if they would let me slide out without paying for the broken mug. Wrong. I knew better and was stopped. I was questioned and told that I needed to pay. I could feel my irritation rise. I think it was a combination of the fact that I couldn't communicate with them on what happened or what I thought of how irritating it is to shop at their store. After a little bit of trying to communicate and my anger feeling almost unbearable I took out a 20 lempira bill (About US $1) - the cost of the mug - and pretty much threw it at them and walked out. I said something to the effect that I wouldn't be back to shop there and oh...I said a swear word too. Oops.

Why did I get so upset? This is what baffles me. I'm not one to feel so hot headed about something so stupid. I can blame it on the annoying hovering, the lack of communication since I don't speak Spanish, or the break it - you buy it policy, but ultimately I think it's a combination of everything. I was brought to a point where I felt like I couldn't control my anger. To the point that I swore in front of my kids to strangers. We walked out of the store and I had to apologize to my kids. It was horrible. I felt horrible! I lost sleep about it that night agonizing about what horrible behavior I had. Why didn't I just get out the money as soon as it broke? Why did I want to be let off the hook? I don't know, but I drove home from that experience telling myself that I will never get used to living in Honduras and feeling very discouraged.

BTW, the mug my son broke, it was a very nice Care Bear themed mug. Just what every Honduran wants - right? Probably some cast offs from some silly themed gift set.

How do you feel about the "you break it - you buy it" policy? I'm curious.

Here's A Little Catch Up

Life here in Honduras has been moving along at a steady pace. I can't believe it's been about 8 months we've been living here now. Being that I now have a job, I've been feeling less cooped up, you could say. It's also starting to get hot around Honduras so it's nice to get out of this concrete oven we live in for a short escape at work.

My Teaching Job
The job teaching English has been going good. I've been hearing good feed back anyway about my teaching skills. I do like it and find it a good challenge. But there are two major issues with the job. The company I work for doesn't pay well and the time it takes to get ready, spend money on gas to get to work and the cost for childcare makes my "take home" pretty measly. That and I also hate being away from my kids and husband for a big chunk of the day. It really makes the job a lot less appealing. Papa says he misses dinner together at night too.

But who knows. I'm going to see if they would be willing to up my pay and maybe I'll stick around. If not, I'm going to see if I can pick up some students to tutor in English. So if you know someone around here wanting English lessons- send them my way.

The Maid Situation
Lets see...Ah yes. Our maid that I mentioned in my last post. We brought her back. Her name is Melinda, btw. We did attempt to find someone else. We called a girl highly recommended, but after talking with her on the phone, I guess you just need to figure that, "I'll get back to you" = no.

After debating the issue for a few days and weighing all the feedback we got from everyone, Papa and I talked to the maid's parents and sat down with Melinda too and gave her a second chance. I guess Melinda's father gave her a pretty harsh talking to, too. The first few days she was back, she was a little uncomfortable, but now seems to be back to her usual self. Laughing and talking. The one thing that helped us make the decision to bring her back, was that our son seems to like her and she likes him. They play and laugh. It's cute.

It's A Zoo Out There
On another note, I got into a small fender-bender a few weeks ago with the car. Papa was not happy. Maybe you saw me mention it on twitter. I rear-ended someone who I didn't see stop. Yeah...it basically cost me my whole months salary to get it fixed. But it looks better now than it did before because there was still some damage from my 1st accident. I think Americans have it almost too easy in the states because you can drive mindlessly. I remember driving places and arriving to my destination and thinking..."was I even watching the road?", "How did I get here?" The roads are wide, open and clear in the states for the most part. Cars usually stay in their lanes and drive at a fairly consistent speed. People don't make frequent sudden stops and theres not cars jetting out in front of you causing sudden breaking. In Honduras you better drive with both hands on the wheel and keep your eyes on the road and what's in front of you. Stay alert! I think that is where I have trouble. I think I forget I need to stay so alert.

Places to Go
We made it to the beach last week. It was a perfect day. I brought the camera and didn't take one photo. Sorry. A friend came along with her two adorable kids and it was a very good day.

I went out a few weekends ago with some girls I met. I also have made kind of a little chum at my job. It's nice to have some girlfriends to hang with. My girls back home can never be replaced, but no matter where you go, I think a girl needs girlfriends. Very important. So we went out and hit the town. Okay we went to one place and stayed there all night. But it was fun and we all danced our tails off. It was a-lotta fun! I felt 25 again.




Brother Updates
Brother graduated from potty training a few weeks ago. It was a bit of a struggle at first. He wouldn't put his "big boy underwear" on but we also would not put a diaper on him. So he ran around naked for a few days. After he wet himself he realized he did not like that and begged and screamed for his diapers. I told him diapers are for babies and had him help me (he watched me) put a diaper on a stuffed animal. He didn't like it at first. He screamed and was very upset at me. He wanted his diapers. But the next day he decided that mama was right; diapers are for babies and started letting us put his underwear on and he would tell us when he had to go. He now refuses to wear anything but his big boy underwear and is bringing himself to the toilet. I''m so proud of him! But the best thing is...no diapers to wash!! Thank heavens for my pila. They are invaluable, in my opinion.

Sister Updates
Sister has really been making leaps and bounds on her language skills. She is understanding a lot more now and I've seen her react to instructions given in Spanish or she will respond in English to what she hears in Spanish. I've been encouraging her tutor to get her to speak more now. Sister also has been picking up a lot of Spanish at school. Her friends seem to be pretty good with trying to help her speak more. They understand that she needs to learn.

I didn't mention this before, but we hired a woman in the neighborhood a few blocks from us that drives her kids and one other kid to school. I was a bit hesitant at first to hire this woman. Mainly because I didn't like that she was charging us so much even though she would be bringing her kids to the school anyway. She's charging us about $50/month which is almost the total cost of gas. We could hire a bus service to pick her up for less, but she would be picked up very early. So paying a little more has worked out well and Sister has fun with the kids she rides with and they too help her with Spanish.

Language
I on the other hand, am still in desperate need of Spanish lessons. I tried to study from the computer with some of the free programs out there on the web. I tried to read my Learn Spanish books. I don't know what I need because everything I do on my own puts me to sleep. Literally. And I don't retain anything. It's like I read it and forget it. At least that's how I feel.

Papa Updates
Papa has been working really hard. What else is new? Ha! I wish there was a magic formula to make his business grow like we want it to. But the systems here are so backwards and literally no one is consistent or is dishonest with their business practices, which makes it very difficult. Papa's joy definitely is in his family. He might have a very stressful day, but he always has room for love and play for the kids and wife.

That's All Folks
I could keep on writing but I'll stop this post here. Just wanted to catch you up on some things.

Calabaza ~ Calabeza

I hope everyone had a festive Thanksgiving with all the yummy trimmings. The holiday crept up on me and before I knew it I was scrambling in my head on how we were going to celebrate the day. Sister's school had a half day on Thursday and they celebrated with a few parent volunteers who came in with a Thanksgiving meal cooked for all the kids. No stuffing, sweat potatoes or green bean casserole; but turkey, corn on the cob and some mashed potatoes, which I guess were so goopey and runny Sister didn't even know what they were. She said they were really yellow too. Maybe it was yellow gravy? Or butter? Sister brought some leftover turkey home and it was good, but dry. I'm guessing the women who cooked it hadn't cooked a turkey before, though it is easy to dry a turkey out roasting. It was a cute attempt at an American tradition.

I, on the other hand decided I would cook chicken, tzimmes (which are a Jewish carrot/sweet potato dish), a can of green beans (creative -huh?) and mashed potatoes. Sister was begging for pumpkin pie and I thought she would enjoy this little idea I had (see below). I stopped at the grocery store on the way home thinking I'd be able to find a can of pumpkin.

I searched the canned goods aisle with no luck. It's not uncommon for them to put holiday items someplace other than the obvious, so at the checkout I asked if they had any "calabeza". Okay...let me stop here for a moment. I would say that my Spanish is equivalent to a two year old. I often say things wrong or put words in the wrong order and definitely have horrible conjugation of verbs. All this might be cute for a two year old. So what did I ask for??? Well, I guess that would maybe translate as "pumpkin head"? Ha ha ha!

Calabaza = pumpkin. (cal-ah-bah-sa)
Cabeza = head (ca-bay-sa).
So you put the two together and what have you got? A pumpkin head!! I told Papa when I got home and he had a good laugh on me. Doh! See? I told you I needed Spanish lessons.

On with the post. We never got our can of pumpkin that night and Sister ended up having a school program in the evening so we never even got to eat the Thanksgiving meal I made (that night anyway, though we had leftovers for a few days). By the time we left the school event we were starving so just stopped at KFC for kids meals. KFC popcorn chicken is pretty yummy here, by the way.

On Saturday, I needed to make a run for another grocery store here in San Pedro Sula that sells whole wheat flour. Guess what they had? Pumpkin! Yep, we bought a can and here is what we made. It is soo good! And lowfat! We used fat free vanilla yogurt and Cool Whip light. I also used fresh ginger instead of dried and used just a pinch of nutmeg instead of the 3/4 tsp. It didn't freeze completely by the time we ate it, but was stiff and a little icy. The next day it was frozen through and perfect! Maybe you'd like to try it? So here is the recipe I used.

Frozen Yogurt Pumpkin Pie

Ingredients:

Graham Cracker Crust
1 1/2 Cups Graham Cracker Crumbs
2 Tablespoons Sugar
1/4 Cup Margarine, melted

Or store bought crust!

Pie Filling
16 Ounces Pumpkin
3/4 Cup Brown Sugar, packed
1 Teaspoon Cinnamon
3/4 Teaspoon Ginger
3/4 Teaspoon Nutmeg
2 Cups Yogurt, Skim Milk
1 Cup Cool Whip Lite, thawed

Directions:
Heat oven to 350~. Mix ingredients for pie crust. Press firmly and evenly against bottom and sides of 9" pie pan. Bake for 10 minutes; cool. Mix pumpkin, brown sugar, cinnamon, ginger and nutmeg in medium bowl. Stir in yogurt. Fold in Cool Whip. Pour into prepared crust. Freeze 4-5 hours or until firm. Remove from freezer 45 minutes before serving. Freeze any remaining pie.

School Days in Honduras

Sister Sprout started school on August 15th. What a big change not only for her, but for me too. I didn't want to post about the new school in a new country until I felt like I had a handle on things.

Sister's old school in America was very nice, clean with high tech AV systems and phones in every room, etc. It also was an accredited International Baccalaureate school and drew students from all over the metro area of Minneapolis. They had Spanish taught once a week. This has proved to be helpful for Sister giving her a jump on the language because she already has a basic foundation of how to read and write Spanish. Her teachers here tell us that based on her current level along with her tutoring 1 hour 6 days/week that she could be speaking Spanish by the end of the year. Let's hope! But I digress a little.

We chose Sister's school by a recommendation from a family member who sends their kids to the same school. It is a private bi-lingual school. They have a current and informational website, and all the staff I've had to talk with has had awesome English. There were a few schools we visited where the staff we were talking to didn't seem to have a strong command of the language. I got the feeling that they didn't understand me when I asked questions, or maybe didn't know how to answer properly in English.

Back in June, Sister was tested and enrolled. She had to take a test on the basics. Reading, writing and math. She didn't do so good. Maybe she was feeling insecure? I don't know, but Papa and I had to write a letter saying we would work with her as needed if she was falling behind. The good thing was that the school also said they would work with her as needed as long as we re-enforced things at home with extra help or tutoring. Okay, fine. I wasn't jumping up and down, but a parent has to do what they have to do for their kids- right? Of course.

It took a while for us to find a Spanish tutor as that seemed to be the first order of things. It took us almost the whole summer. We found a tutor the last 3 weeks of the summer before school started. She gets 1 hour of tutoring 6 days a week. It costs us L100 per hour. That is about US $5/hour. This is a very reasonable price for a professional to teach Spanish privately. We talked to a few who wanted L200/hour.

By the end of the first week I was a bit overwhelmed by how much work it was going to be to keep Sister on task. I don't like to compare things too much between the states and Honduras. But if I do, it would probably be something about how the states have this or that and how Honduras is lacking. Not here on this subject. All I was thinking about was how miserably easy Sister had it in the states. Maybe it was just her school? Maybe it's the American school system with the "no child left behind" agenda pushing all the flunking and behind students along forcing the curriculum and the teaching methods to have to accommodate? There were a lot of immigrant students in Sister's old school and often these kids are behind in reading and writing especially because English was not their home language and their parents didn't/couldn't work with them. The school was 33% white, 39% black and the rest made up of Asians, Hispanics, and "other". We lived in a lower middle class neighborhood close to two main highways and with open enrollment with the IB program there seemed to be a lot of inner city kids at the school. I'll leave it there, but I think you get what I'm saying. Honestly, the amount of work and organization that the kids are required at Sister's school here in Honduras blows her old school in the states out of the water in comparison.

**And the kids are good! I sat in Sister's class in the states a few times and there were always a few that were so disruptive to the class. Not sitting still, talking out of turn, not paying attention. I was exhausted sitting in the class, watching for an hour, I didn't know how the teacher could possibly handle it all day long. Here, if the kids are bad, they are kept after school to sit in their seats with their heads down. They also have "warnings" where I guess if you get a certain amount (3?) you can be suspended for a day. It seems they expect a high level of responsibility from the kids too. They have a "no excuses" for missed homework.

The kids earn points and can lose them by not completing their homework, being late for school, missing school with no excuse, or even if a parent misses a scheduled meeting at the school! Both Papa and I couldn't make it to a meeting they set up at the school for parents to listen to hired speakers about how to help your kids succeed. Papa couldn't get out of work and we were down to one vehicle due to a stupid HUGE pothole that blew the tire and rim of Papa's motorcycle. So neither of us could make it to the meeting and Sister lost school points and this was on a Saturday!

And if the student is not doing well they will hold them back or if it's really apparent that the child is flunking by their own accord with no support from the family, well...they get to leave. Maybe seeing on a daily basis what real poverty is for those with no education is motivation to actually want to succeed? Here, if the child doesn't succeed, well, they will be "left behind".

The kids are required to carry all their own text books, notebooks and various supplies to and from school every day. I was shocked at first. We went out and bought a normal backpack thinking they would at least get a locker for their books. Nope. Luckily Sister has her own travel carry-on suitcase that she brought with from the states. This is now her school bag. There are school buses (vans) to take kids to and from school for a price. They put all the luggage...er...school bags on the top and it looks like they are off to the airport. She still uses the backpack you can see in the photo, but only for various extra items and things she needs for tutoring.

One thing that is different here than in the states is the grade levels. I still don't think I understand this exactly, but at this school, it only goes through grade 11. The kids start some type of formal education around age 3 if it can be afforded. I think they call this "kinder" even at the younger ages and that goes until you start 1st grade at age 6. Since formal schooling only goes to 11th grade and in the states schooling goes until 12th grade, there is a little bit of an overlap. They have to learn things faster here. In the states, Sister was in the highest math section, but here she is in the lower. The teachers asked if we could hire a tutor for her math so that she gets caught up. Ugh! We just started that tutoring and I'm not sure if it's completely necessary. I'm going to have a chat with the tutor next week. Sister is a bright girl and when I sit down and work with her on her math, she seems to be getting it and asks questions that show me she can learn quickly. Maybe she isn't as behind as they think?

We also had a meeting with some teachers and the principle of the school about two of the classes that are taught in Spanish. Espanol (think English class just in Spanish) and Social Studies. They seemed to be quite concerned about he ability to succeed in 4th grade with all of the extra tutoring she was requiring. My heart sank when they suggested possibly putting her back into 3rd grade. But after further discussion, it was decided that she just be monitored and start out by visiting the 1st grade Spanish classes and as she progresses with the language then she will move up quickly and be able to effectively participate in her grade level Spanish classes.

One cool thing is that Sister gets swimming classes two times a week. She also has a regular PE class once a week. They have a different uniform the kids wear on PE days, which is just a knit top tucked into some navy blue sweats and all white tennis shoes. Fridays are regular clothes day. So Sister wears her button down shirt/skirt uniform twice a week and her PE uniform twice a week and her regular clothes on Fridays. They can wear pretty much anything they want on those days except mini skirts and spaghetti strap tank tops. Sister doesn't seem to mind the uniforms at all.

The school day starts at 7:15am and ends at 1:30pm. We are up usually by 5:45am and in the car driving to school by 6:40 at the latest. Yes, the kids finally go to bed around 8pm and me and Papa aren't too long after that. 10pm feels really late now. At school they get a snack time and lunch. The lunches they serve are typical Honduran foods for L30 ($1.60). They also have ala cart items like pizza, spaghetti and sandwich's. Sister brings her own lunch a lot, but also likes to have her pizza days. They don't have the best food choices, but what can you do? Sister learned her lesson by buying a soda one day and the bees go nuts for sugar drinks. She now prefers to drink water so the bees leave her alone.

So far everything about school seems to be going over pretty good, except homework. But who likes homework? Honestly I dread the homework too because that means I have to be the homework police and keep her on task or help her along if needed. I'm learning too how to be that stay at home mom who is there for the kids. It's a hard job but is also very gratifying. I'm happy that she is making friends and seems to enjoy school.

I purposely left out the name of the schools mentioned here. If anyone reads this and wants to know about the schools, you can contact me via the email listed on my profile.

** UPDATE Sister tells me last night that the kids are acting bad these days now that everyone is used to school. Interesting that she says they only act bad in the English speaking classes, but act perfect in the Spanish speaking classes.

Little Boy Mocking Bird

Brother this morning starting saying a word he's been hearing a lot lately.

"Hola!"

Melinda, a girl we have come clean was at the house this morning. Brother walked into the room where she was and clear as a bell said "Hola". At first we thought it was so cute, but then he didn't stop. It was like listening to a talking bird who wouldn't shut-up. I realized he thought Melinda's name was "hola" so I tried to tell him her name and he even repeated back to me as a question in 2 year old speak, "ey-inda?". I assured him her name was indeed Melinda and then he said, "no - hola".

I tried to get a good video, but it was when I walked out of the room that he would start to squawk loudly.

What's That Word

I was talking to Papa yesterday afternoon on the phone. He had just gotten done with work and after eating and taking a shower he was feeling pretty sleepy I guess. In our conversation I could tell he was really struggling to find some English words. It's expected that his English would start to head to the back burner a little when he never has to speak it except to me and the kids. But yesterday, I realized that when he is tired, it is even more hard for him to pull some less common words. The two I remember him drawing a blank on were "resume" and "customs". There were a few others, but I can't remember them now.

I started to laugh and he sheepishly told me not to laugh at him. I told him I was sorry, but it was cute the way he was trying to explain these things without actually using the words. Kind of like a guessing game. I know it was mostly due to him being tired.

Next week is my last week of work and I get Monday off because of memorial day so I only have 4 days left at my job! I can't believe it!

This weekend I have nothing planned except to go to my nephew's 5th birthday party, pack and pack and pack and then make sure to get everything ready to send with this guy who is shipping my life down to Honduras on Saturday afternoon. I am not shipping anything of huge value. But there are things going down that really feel priceless to me. I have these shadow boxes of the kid's baby items and some other little things I've collected over the years. Gosh, I would be crushed if they didn't make it. Say a little prayer that everything makes it. Thanks :)

Speaking of shipping. I actually have an address to ship to. Papa found a 3 bedroom house to rent. It is in San Pedro Sula- which is where we will be staying temporarily until we move to Copan. I was a little bummed that we would not be moving to Copan right away, but because of Papa's business, the move needed to be put on hold.

We will have to furnish the entire house including all appliances. All furniture and even pots, pans, towels, bedding...everything! And get this - it's not common in Honduras for middle class type homes to be built with closets. How am I going to hang up all my clothes? I really don't like to fold and then have everything all wrinkly. We may have to invest in a big armoire or something. I don't know what the heck we are going to do about that because Papa is worse than me when it comes to not having wrinkled clothes. He likes to be perfectly pressed.

*The going away party in June 2nd for anyone who wants to come say goodbye at French Park in Plymouth MN

La Clase de Espanol

Honduras Sprout #2 had her first weekly meeting with a Spanish tutor. She also has Spanish class in school one time per week and to really drive things home, we have arranged for Tia (aunt), Papa's sister to meet once a week to just read and have some casual Spanish conversation. With all of this, I think she will be better prepared for the move in June and then being able to start school at the end of August.

HS #2 is not the only one having to work on her Spanish. Mama has to do some work too. I start my Spanish classes next month. I'm terrified I will never learn to speak.